29/11 im doing my very dearest best. yes yes yes and yes. YES IM TRYING AND IM DECIDING TO DO SO BEAUTIFULLY. tomorrow i will wear an outrageous little outfit and buy myself that <3long awaited<3 matcha bubble tea that i will BEAUTIFULLY share with my loves. i think ill wear my IM BAD t shirt and maybe underneath a cute little skirt. i will flirt shamelessly and laugh and make plans. i will decide to stay in love and i will decide to always act as THE MOST SACRED GiRL (the happiest girl) it’s enough right now ! i light a white candle (as my angels told me they preferred) and i dutifully and joyfully put cloves around it. my candle is nested in a little cup i bought a year ago from a second hand shop. it looks exactly like the FANCY LITTLE CUPS of my CHILDHOOD. as a LITTLE GIRL i stare at them and theyre reserved for only the most special occasions and my mother serves everyone hot chocolate on their big cups and i’m a child drinking hot chocolate around the people i love in my little pink rose-d cup. NOW THE LIGHT IS BURNING AND OH OH OH IM DECIDING TO BURN IT ALL AWAY. burn it so much .

21/12 CHICA SAGRADA muy bien!!! HELLO <3 fantaseo con un amor PERFECTO why not bbg? un amor perfecto es un amor en ke ambas estamos DOING OUR BEST i ask the universe: BRING ME PERFECT LOVE PERFECT SITUATIONS AND PERFECT EXPERIENCES in my life ke PRIME el amor : amor a la vida amor a mi vida amor a mi mente amor a mi alma amor a mi yo de niña amor a mi yo de 24 años amor a mi yo de 22 amor a mi yo de 23 amor a mi yo de 19 amor a mi yo de 13 amor a mi yo de 14 amor a mi yo de 17 amor a mi yo de 15 amor a mi yo de 10 amor a mi yo de 9 amor a mi yo de 6 amor a mi yo de 21 amor a mi yo de 7 qmor q mi yo de 8 amor a mi yo de 4. AMOR AL ARTE AMOR AL MUNDO AMOR A MIS AMIGUES AMOR A MIS AMORES AMOR A MI VIDA A MI PROPOSITO A MI VOCACION A MI ALINEAMIENTO A MI BALANCE A MI VIDA PERFECTA SEAL IT W A KISSssssssssssssssS <3

01/08 BENDECIDA BENDECIDA TAMOS BENDECIA AKI CON MIS BBYS TAMOS BENDECIDA

12/02 the tiny bed together and me, always: can i ask you something? you bring your hand next to me and enclose it between your fingers: im pushing your palm against mine and GETTING CLOSE "you're always getting closer to me" i'm always getting closer to you.

11/12 I’M A SACRED GIRL AND I WANT SACRED LUV I WANT U TO WANT TO SEE ME OBSERVE ME I WANT U TO WANT TO GET CLOSER TO ME valky tells me “i need them to be completely obsessed with me “ THEN SHE GETS LOST IN THEM. we dance together and she kisses me and i feel SHY (but not in a good way) I AM SO FULL OF FUTURE AND PAST I’M A GIFT OF THE PRESENT yes holding hands is fun but for me I WANT IT ALL i want to experience divinity and sacredness and TRANSCENDENCE and when you’re with me YOU FEEL IT 2.

22/12 im gonna get home take a SHOWER paint my lips wear the CUTEST outfit with ribbons and luv and i will smell wonderful and i’ll wear my best smile and drink melon iced tea i will be in calmness and fun and joy i will be acting out of MI CHIKA HOT side abd my NEVERENOUGH beautiful side of my being SOUTH AMERICAN . and i will laugh and not diminish myself or reduce myself i will be present and grateful i will romanticize eevrtything if everything is too muhh ch i will bring a notebook to draw

14/08 feeling so sleepy my girl has the sweetest tooth <3 we pull up to the gas station before our sleepovers and we buy sweets and chips and candy. she eats everything while i close my eyes on her chest and we watch the movie. i kiss her neck everytime she takes a bite and she talks fast and loud and im a SALTY GIRL!!! i have already eaten and i dedicate my life to hugging her while falling asleep. she is a SWEET GIRL and she laughs and moves around and forgets how to whisper. she talks so much i dream about her being the narrator and feeling shy about it. i am so sleepy everytime but i’m the happiest <3

12/12 i go to L’s flat on a tuesday night and i stay there for four hours. she walks me to the tram stop and we’re both smiling. I AM A GIRL OF DETAILS i look at her drawings on her sketchbooks, on the walls even the ones drawn with colored pens on her grinders and the kitchen. is it possible to know EVERYTHING? when i apply for the university christine puts her hands against the pages of my portfolio and she tells me it’s beautiful . a year later i fall asleep with her clothes on surrounded by her anime figurines and when we wake up she gives me three different types of musli, packs me lunch and walks me to the station (WE DONT HOLD HANDS OR KISS GOODBYE) i go to drawing class wearing her socks, her charm chain and her sweat still on me.

14/1 see sex for me is DEVOTION who even are you?

19/02 having A BIG heart……… my heart gets broken easily but who cares ! it’s always filled UP w LUV LUV N LUV